Agree to Disagree - Move Forward

Recently, I was able to reconnect with an old friend. He and I are total opposites. He is a single, white, male and  I am a married, black, male. He and I do not agree on many political and religious points, but no matter our differences - we respect each other. The common denominator is that we both recognize that no matter how strong our differences the bond of friendship is greater.

Our friendship was born through adversity.  We both shared a room in the middle of Ar Ramadi Iraq in 2004-2005.  We would close our eyes to constant shelling of the forward operating base. We witnessed many of our comrades loss both life and limb. We shed silent tears as we learned of our fallen and wounded comrades. 

Our friendship was born through joy. We both laughed at the same funny jokes that our other roommates told. We enjoyed our Friday movie night with popcorn and soda.  We shared the wonderful memories of our families back home.

When I consider some of the toxic and hateful debates that I read on facebook, on the radio, and sometimes on television – it saddens me. This country, the United States of America, was formed from the struggle against tyranny. It matured through civil war. We, as Americans, have shared the joys of freedom and life.   At the end of the name, we are all Americans whose bond is intertwined through adversity and joy.

Our forefathers had very strong opinions while developing the framework of our country.  A great example is Alexander Hamilton and Thomas Jefferson debates on federalism and antifederalism.  The United States needed both influences. It was the country's good fortune that it had both men and could, in time, fuse and reconcile their philosophies. It is hopeful, that our current debate about government can be resolved and the politicians can agree to disagree. They need to look back over the joy and adversity of this great country  and move forward,  not backwards. 

 My prayer for our country is we can learn to have strong debates and walk away agreeing to disagree. That is what my friend and I did when we got off the phone.   We even compromised on some of our differences and planned to help each other out in the future.